Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of my D&E. May 28th will forever be etched in my heart. Oh what a sad day that was. All month I’ve been thinking about where we were this time last year. That doctor’s appointment, that sonogram… Such a sad time for my family. Honestly I’m thankful that this first anniversary is almost over.
Today I was thinking about the morning before the procedure. I had to take a pill that basically started contractions. I can picture that ugly hotel bedspread that I was curled up on. I lay there crying from the physical and emotional pain when I said to Josh, “I don’t ever want to be pregnant again”. The raw emotion of that still feels like a punch in the gut. The pain has dulled some but it is definitely still there.
We really wanted to do something to remember Grace. Unfortunately, this is Josh’s weekend to work. Since we wouldn’t be able to go somewhere or do something, we came up with a unique idea. We purchased a flock of chicks through Heifer International. If you haven’t heard of Heifer International, they are an organization that helps millions of families by providing gifts of livestock, seeds, trees and training which will give the families a source of food and income. I love the idea of baby chicks running around somewhere in memory of Grace. Plus it’s something that we can do every year.
Soon enough tomorrow will be over and we’ll continue to move forward. Never forgetting but always moving forward…
Our thoughts and prayers are with you in this challenging time. Grace is a very loved little angel.
I’ll be praying for you my dear – we lost a little one earlier this year, not as far along as you were, but…yeah. The baby chicks idea sounds like such a perfect remembrance.
**hugs** I’ve also been thinking about you guys all month. So many of those same days are frozen in my mind as well, intertwined with all of my moving and turning around to come right back up there. Oh, how I hated leaving you again that morning!
I love you all, so so much, and I’m keeping Grace (and all of you) in my thoughts and in my heart. I love what you did with Heifer International. I wish I could be with you this weekend instead of at work.
Thinking of you. Hope the pain continues to subside as time goes by.